{"product_id":"always-lubricate-the-backdoor-first-™-funny-shirt-heavyweight-unisex-crewneck-t-shirt-gildan®-5000","title":"Always Lubricate The Backdoor First.™ | Funny Shirt | Heavyweight Unisex Crewneck T-shirt | Gildan® 5000","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSome\nadvice should never be followed.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA good locksmith knows preparation is everything. The right tools.\nA steady hand. And apparently... plenty of lubrication. 😂\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAlways Lubricate The Backdoor First.™\u003c\/strong\u003e is\ntechnically responsible lock-maintenance advice. Anything else you\nread into it is entirely between you and your backdoor.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eLook closer and it only gets worse:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e🔑 \u003cstrong\u003eProfessional Locksmith — We Get In.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n🚪\n\u003cstrong\u003eKeep It Tight. Keep It Private.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n🧰 \u003cstrong\u003eGood\nAccess Is 90% Preparation.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCompletely innocent. Professionally certified. Absolutely nothing\nsuspicious happening here.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy you'll love it:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\t\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003ePremium heavyweight unisex T-shirt\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\t\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eComfortable everyday fit\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\t\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eDurable DTG print\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\t\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eOriginal Terrible Life Advice artwork\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\t\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eVintage distressed typography\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\t\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003ePerfect for dirty minds, locksmiths, inappropriate friends,\n\tand people who appreciate suspiciously specific maintenance advice\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\t\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eGuaranteed to make someone read it twice\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e⚠️ \u003cstrong\u003eWarning:\u003c\/strong\u003e May cause laughter, inappropriate\ninterpretations, and people asking where the hell you got your shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSome advice should never be followed.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Terrible Life Advice","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":55074976760137,"sku":"d45ad4fb-c2ee-4e0c-a18b-69dfbac2a79a","price":24.99,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":55074976792905,"sku":"5d82b2ee-bb87-4c85-b64b-1eae0c049d32","price":24.99,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":55074976825673,"sku":"317c1adf-e44f-406b-a4d3-9d06b3358cd4","price":24.99,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":55074976858441,"sku":"1eb9be16-239e-49fe-bb6c-68e6fb02c2ce","price":24.99,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":55074976891209,"sku":"573fa4bb-cf1a-4a14-ab97-c48af6f46ca9","price":26.99,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":55074976923977,"sku":"11dfd359-57f5-443c-bccb-dd5d70101073","price":26.99,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1021\/4699\/8601\/files\/6de35235-8698-4a8c-96bd-8b6d28cd16d3.webp?v=1786902013","url":"https:\/\/terriblelifeadvice.com\/products\/always-lubricate-the-backdoor-first-%e2%84%a2-funny-shirt-heavyweight-unisex-crewneck-t-shirt-gildan%c2%ae-5000","provider":"Terrible Life Advice","version":"1.0","type":"link"}